Day 123 Chemo #7

So! 123, eh that's a pretty big number. Guess it means we've gone quite a long way. It does feel routine now, mechanically scheduled, going through the motions. I can't decide whether thats good or bad. Good that the predictability of it helps give order and sense; bad if only that illness dictates my daily agendas. Listening to NPR today, I chanced upon an interview with the rabbi author of "When bad things happen to good people". (See the transcript here.) If God is omnipotent, why does tragedy mercilessly perpetuate in all people of and of no faith? What is "fair"? The rabbi makes a point to say he believes that tragedies are not sent by God, but He sends the "strength and vision" that we need to overcome, and he sends the comfort and compassion that we need to keep going. An interesting perspective, but I really took it to heart. Sometimes you hear just what you crave at not a moment too soon.
On a tangent, kind people have been telling me that I'm courageous or "amazing", but really, it's so much easier to strong when I have so so so much love and support from everyone, my Wilbur, my family, my friends, and especially my God.
I'm quite done with my rambling for today. As Bong says "how are you still awake?"