On good days, life is remarkably normal. This day is one of those rarities; I feel better today than I have in about two weeks. It's amazing, liberating. Think about that moment when you know your cold or flu has lifted, and suddenly all of the nothings you take for granted are so charming -- no achyness, no dizziness, no sick feeling. Even my hair has reached a temporary detente with my scalp. It's clinging on for dear life.
Having gone through the last three treatments on a timely schedule, it's a great relief to be halfway to the finish. But also because the biweekly schedule is one that allows for just enough time for the white blood cell count to recover from its nadir, it's tantamount to letting my body reclaim its balance just enough to knock it back down. On these good days, I exercise, eat right, and try to get myself as strong as possible. I know I can power through the next three (incredible that it's so few!) treatments. It makes me consider those cancer survivors who do months and years of chemo and marvel at their perseverence. I don't know if I could handle any more without a tangible goal in sight.
These days, Wilbur and I are constantly speaking in future tense -- when we get out of this desert ... where do you want to live next? what job will you be at? when will we have kids? That definitely gives a firm grip on the next step.
Wishing you Hope, Dreams, and Faith
p.s. lunch menu coming up today - bo luc lac, (the shaking beef recipe from SF's Slanted Door. Oh, how I miss foodie restaurants!) which when wilbur says it, popo thinks he's saying bo good luck
p.p.s. recently i finished "The Boat" by Nam Le, short stories with voices from around the world, but including a story on the boat people. read it, it's haunting.
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